At The Crossroads

Many of you have inquired about my health and I wanted to take a few minutes and give those of you who follow what I read a brief update.  Some of you have speculated that the increase in my entries lately is a sign indicating that I’m on the mend.  I wish that were true!  It’s my way of trying to make the best of the situation and quite frankly, when I don’t post anything I miss the contact with my dysfunctional family out here in Spaces.  My doctor is trying to rule out a few things as causes of my hard to treat hypertension and rapid pulse.  I have sleep apnea and she feels my health problems are most likely  the result of me never being able to get used to my C-Pap machine.  She was quite frank with me and pointed out that I’m slowly killing my brain by lack of oxygen and if I don’t start using my machine I will die from a heart attack or stroke. So over the next few months I have to faithfully use the dreaded C-Pap and see if my health improves…if not, then it’s off to other tests and most likely other medications.  Now is the time I really have to ask myself what I really want and how self-destructive am I.  I appreciate all the support I’ve received and want to thank each of you for hanging in there with me. 

 

 

©2005 Abnormally Normal People. All rights reserved.

The Day Of Reckoning

All week I had been feeling "funny". It wasn’t what I would call being sick, but I could definitely tell something wasn’t right. I was becoming increasingly tired and by the end of the week I was light-headed and dizzy. Friday at work, I was asked to walk some papers over to the dialysis unit on the top floor in the hospital. When I left my desk and started walking I felt like my legs were light also…I had the sensation of almost feeling like I could fly.

I was glad I had a follow-up appointment scheduled for late Friday afternoon with my primary care provider who happens to be not only a general practitioner, but an internist as well. The previous month, she had put me on blood pressure medication and a diuretic because my blood pressure was elevated and my legs had been swelling. The first morning after having my prescriptions filled, I chuckled over the irony that I had finally become my mother. While I sat filling my pill case, visions of my mother doing the same action filled my head. I remembered how I always used to tease her about being a "virtual drugstore" and how she has a separate bag just for all her pills when she goes on vacation. She always told me whenever I teased her, "your day is going to come!" I guess she was right because my day has finally come!

I usually hate going to the doctor, but Friday I was actually glad I had an appointment. My follow-up appointment was to check to see if my blood pressure medication was working like it should and to get the results of my lab work. I had been instructed to take my blood pressure periodically throughout the month, but after the first couple of weeks of use, my blood pressure machine’s batteries had run down. I hadn’t gone to the store to buy any new batteries because each day after I left work, I would go home and fall asleep. I was worn out although I hadn’t been doing anything strenuous and my fatigue seemed to increase each day.

While I sat in the waiting room at the doctor’s office, not only did I feel dizzy, but the whole left side of my face and head felt tingly. When the nurse took my blood pressure, she asked me if I had been taking my medication. I assured her that I had been taking it as instructed by the doctor and inquired what my blood pressure was. She told me it was 190/90. I was shocked because it had never gotten that high before, but it at least explained why I had been feeling so rough all week.

The doctor examined me thoroughly, gave me my lab and then talked to me about my diabetes and blood pressure. She gave me advice and changed my medication, but wouldn’t let me leave the office until she had gotten my blood pressure to a safer level. On my way home I smiled at how assertive she had been when she told me I was "done for the day" and that the only thing I was going to do was go home and lay down. I think for the first time in my life I did as I was told. Because it scared me, I had no problem being obedient. Visions of my grandmother in her wheelchair ran through my head. She had stroke as a result of having diabetes. I thought about my father’s death from a heart attack at the age of 58. Several other relatives ran through my head and then I remembered when I was in my 20′s and I always would say I would worry about getting diabetes and heart disease when and if the day came I developed those things. I always said there was no need to worry about something I may never get. How wrong I was in having that attitude and I now regret not thinking about my health many years ago before I developed the conditions I never believed I would get. Since I cannot turn back the hands of time, the only thing I can do is be more compliant with my doctor’s orders and try to lower my HgA1c, cholesterol, triglycerides and blood pressure.

 

 

©2005 Abnormally Normal People. All rights reserved.

The Curse Of Womanhood

Always remember:  Real women don’t have hot flashes, they have power surges!

 

You know you’re going through menopause if…

 

You sell your home heating system at a yard sale. (Hot flashes)

* The person you sleep with complains about snow piling up on the bed. (Nightsweats)

* Your husband jokes that instead of buying a wood stove, he is using you to heat the family room this winter. Rather than just saying you are not amused, you shoot him. (Mood swings)

* You write post-it notes with your kid’s names on them. (Memory loss)

* Your husband chirps, "Hi honey, I’m home." and you reply, "Well, if it isn’t Ozzie fucking Nelson". (Irritability)

* The phenobarbital dose that wiped out the Heaven’s Gate Cult gives you four hours of decent rest. (Sleeplessness)

* You find Guacamole in your hair after a Mexican dinner. (Fatigue)

* You change your underwear after every sneeze. (Mild incontinence)

* You need Jaws Of Life to help you out of your car after returning home from an Italian restaurant. (Sudden weight gain)

* You ask Jiffy Lube to put you up on a hoist. (Dryness)

* You take a sudden interest in "Wrestlemania". (Female hormone deficiency)

* You’re on so much estrogen that you take your Brownie troop on a field trip to Chippendales. (Hormone therapy)

 

10 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE "ESTROGEN ISSUES"

Everyone around you has an attitude problem.

You’re adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet.

The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.

Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.

You’re using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says "How’s my driving-call 1-800-***-."

Everyone’s head looks like an invitation to batting practice.

You’re convinced there’s a God and he’s male.

You can’t believe they don’t make a tampon bigger than Super Plus.

You’re sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.

The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.

Are You Having Trouble Seeing?

For Linda

Taken from The Breast Cancer Site:

 

Your click on the "Fund Free Mammograms" button helps fund free mammograms, paid for by site sponsors whose ads appear after you click and provided to women in need through the efforts of the National Breast Cancer Foundation to low-income, inner-city and minority women, whose awareness of breast cancer and opportunity for help is often limited.

 

EARLY DETECTION: DO YOU KNOW THE FACTS?

Each year, 182,000 women are diagnosed with breast cancer and 43,300 die. One woman in eight either has or will develop breast cancer in her lifetime. In addition, 1,600 men will be diagnosed with breast cancer and 400 will die this year.

If detected early, the five-year survival rate exceeds 95%. Mammograms are among the best early detection methods, yet 13 million U.S. women 40 years of age or older have never had a mammogram.

The National Cancer Institute and U.S. Department of Health and Human Services recommend that women in their forties and older have mammograms every one to two years. A complete early detection plan also includes regular clinical breast examinations by a trained medical professional. Monthly breast self-exams are suggested in addition.

Click here for more information about breast cancer and the issues surrounding it.

Kitten Gams

As requested by Jnuts (thanks once again for causing a disturbance in the force by showing us your body parts) I have posted yet another reason for humiliation amongst the dysfunctional Spaces family:

"Oh, and I expect to see a photo of your legs hauled out and posted. I know you have long, lanky gams. Bring ‘em."

~JockFullONuts619 aka Jnuts~

 

Indigo has GREAT legs and I’m so jealous! I’m taking my pics down because she puts me to shame! What a cruel world this is! Does anyone else out there have some great stems they want to show off? (The New England Patriot football jersey pics were removed per request of Tom Brady…he said "take it off, baby!"….so I did!)

 

Gams removed 6/7/05

The Diet From Hell

Nothing in life is free, but sometimes the price we pay for things exceeds the value of the item. In the case of gaining weight, fat becomes a very costly commodity. Not only must we figure the cost of the food we consume, but we must figure into the cost all the intangibles like our decreasing sex appeal and youthful figure plus how it effects our own self-worth and many of our relationships. We also must tally into the total any health related problems that have developed as a result of middle age spread…diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, sleep apnea, depression and disk and joint problems just to name a few.

Yes, beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, but let’s face it…a thin person is generally viewed more favorably than someone who is overweight. Employment is harder to find, relationships are more difficult to establish and maintain and each person is more likely to become depressed as the pounds pack on. Not only do we have to battle our own negativity, but we have to deal with the general consensus that in this case less is more! We all tend to put up with more from someone who looks great than from someone who is a great person.

People can sit back and say how unfair this measure of beauty is, but the reality of it is that it does exist and always will. We, as people have a choice to either play the game and decide what price we are willing to pay for what we want. For me, I have decided that "the diet from hell" is the cost I must pay for the goal I want to reach. There’s no quick fix or way around paying the price. I know what I must do and have started doing it. The road ahead requires a lot of will power and delayed gratification, but as I have always taught my children, delayed gratification builds character. So when I reach my goal, not only will I be a "lethal weapon", I’ll be a much stronger person!

 

Results from Month #1: 12 pounds lighter and a total of 4 3/4 overall inches lost. Measurements are taken from the bust, waist, hips and upper thigh at the end of each month.

Is There A Doctor In The House?

I woke up this morning achy and had a sore throat.  As the day progressed, I started feeling worse.  By the time I got home, I was ready to just crawl in bed.  I took my temp and yep, I have a fever.  I’ve been up and down for the last couple of hours because my legs hurt…my arms hurt…in fact, my hurt hurts.  If I’m not around for a few days, it’s only due to being sick.

Also, does anyone know what happened to Jnuts?  I tried to go to his blog and couldn’t.  Did this "imposter" Paul start something with him?  It’s a shame we have so many troublemakers out here and with that said I’m off to bed again.  I’ll watch American Idol and become amazed all over again how they can botch a vote of 30+ million people and redo it the very next night, but when the government botches one it just goes down in history as "that’s life"….

 

A Person, Not a Vegetable

While out here doing my daily rounds of looking at new blogs, I discovered the entry below.  It made me think about the need for people to do a Living Will with Advance Directives. My job puts me in the situation of knowing how important these documents are and in cases like Terri Schavio where there isn’t any Living Will, how devastating making medical decisions can be on a family. 

None of us like to think about dying or being in a position of not being able to voice our wishes, but tragically families do experience the pain of having a family member in the same situation as the one mentioned here.  Some people think just having a DNR order (Do Not Resuscitate) is enough and covers everything, but this is untrue.  Living Wills are very specific in their instructions and are a binding legal document. The article titled,  Living wills can eliminate disputes talks about this issue and what a person can do in order to keep their family members from ever having to be in that painful decision-making situation.  U.S. Living Will Registry or your doctor’s office can provide the necessary information about Living Wills and Advance Directives and answer all your questions.   

A Person, Not a Vegetable

Apparently, the feeding tube will remain in Terri Schavio for another three weeks, until March 18, at which time her husband will remove it and allow her to die.  I have absolutely no right whatsoever to comment on this, but I just want to post this picture and ask you, does she look like an unresponsive vegetable? I do still see a person there — she is smiling at her mother. Look at the eyes, I see something there. For some reason this is wrenching my heart today.

© 2005 Abnormally Normal People. All rights reserved. 

Needed: Liver Transplant and Social Security Disability Contact

I’d like to share the story of Janice Goggin with everyone. Janice is my sister-in-law and her health has deteriorated to the point of needing a new liver. As of last month she was placed on a liver transplant list at the Ochsner Clinic in New Orleans. The medications she has taken for years appear to be the culprit that has caused irreversible liver damage, yet this damage went undetected until she started suffering from ascites (fluid filling up the abdominal cavity) several months ago. She has been a Type2 Insulin Dependent Diabetic for years suffering from secondary illnesses caused by the diabetes and has had a couple bouts of cancer along the way.  Just last week she had a stent placed in the Portal vein of the liver in hopes that it will help curb the ascites.  Hopefully, this will buy her some additional time as she awaits receiving a new liver.   What was supposed to be just an overnight stay in the hospital turned into an almost week long ordeal due to complications.  We are now waiting to see if the stent will do what the doctors hope it will do.

Most people probably aren’t familiar with someone suffering from liver failure.  I was amazed at the amount of fluid that has to be drained from her abdomen each week.  The last draining before the stent was inserted produced 9 liters of fluid.  Her abdomen becomes bloated to an unbelievable size.  The retention of this fluid has a secondary effect as well.  Due to the toxins that are not being passed through her body properly, she is experiencing a mild form of dementia. Janice spends her days confused, forgetful and easily distracted.  As the disease progresses, she is becoming weaker.  As of now she gets around in a wheelchair and can only stand for short periods. 

When she first found out about the condition of her liver, I did research on the internet about liver transplants.  I found they do partial transplants from live donors and I offered her a portion of my liver if we were a compatible tissue match.  During her initial evaluation at Ochsner Clinic, she was told that they only do that type of transplant from an adult donor to a child recipient.  She took that news in stride and remains hopeful, optimistic and steadfast in her faith.  I truly admire her for the courage and strength she has displayed. 

When her health started to deteriorate to the point of not being able to work any longer, she filed for Social Security Disability.  To date she has been denied benefits several times and has been through the appeal process each time her claim is denied.  Reasons for her denial have included medical noncompliance (not taking some medications as prescribed) and smoking. Recently she was told by Social Security to get a job.  I have always heard the "horror stories" that people tell about filing for Social Security Disability, but thought those tales of woe were grossly exaggerated until now.  She hired an attorney that specializes in Social Security claims, but the attorney was unsuccessful also. 

Letters written on Janice’s behalf to any of the contacts listed below would be deeply appreciated by my family.

Congressman Gene Taylor 

Senators Trent Lott and Thad Cochran. 

Governor Haley Barbour

Lt. Governor is Amy Tuck. 

Mississippi Government website.  (various contacts are listed here)

Complaints to the Social Security Administration can be done online. 

 

I also was hoping that someone out here in cyberspace might suggest another course of action or perhaps someone to contact about this situation other than the people already listed above.  My only concern is for her well-being and peace of mind.  I have offered her my help in this matter because this is someone I love dearly and I’m not ready to lose her without a fight.  I know of no better way than by using the internet to quickly connect with as many people as possible. If anyone out here knows what steps I should take to do something that will help secure the benefits she really does deserve and need, please contact me.  Your help and prayers are what she needs most.

Thank you!

Karen G. Miller

Red_Kitten1@yahoo.com

 

I have included pictures of the procedure she has to have done weekly to drain the fluid that builds up in her abdomen.  There is 1 before picture showing how big her abdomen gets, 2 pictures taken during the procedure and 1 taken after 8 liters have been drained to show a comparison in the size of her abdomen.